A December Funeral at Hietaniemi

We were privileged to attend the funeral of a wonderful Finnish man who was gifted with an exceptional sense of humor. When we suggested that he add water to the soup if too many people came for dinner. He said, "No, more salt is the answer." If the mehu got low, he served "vehu." Vehu can get so pale with the addition of more and more water that sometimes it is necessary to set the pitcher on top of a red napkin so the reflected color gives the impression of berry juice. When clearing the table, the person clearing which was the person who unknowingly sat in the official table clearer seat could not stack the plates. That way only one side had to be washed. He helped his children start a successful business that supports three families. He called himself a soap salesman. He had a wonderful generosity of spirit--even taking time to help us plan activities in Helsinki for our visiting children and their families. He died on a Sunday after suffering seven months from the degrading effects of a brain hemorrhage. The funeral was held two weeks later in the chapel at the cemetery. It was a very moving event--both because of the loss of a great man and also because of the Finnish customs that were observed.

Virtually everyone dressed in black. Many of the men wore white scarves. During the funeral each person or group of people who had brought flowers came to the front of the chapel, placed their flowers on racks set on either side of the casket, said some loving words to the family, nodded to the family, observed a moment of silence and returned to their seats. The great majority of attenders brought flowers.

Following the funeral service, the pall bearers hoisted the casket on their shoulders using long straps as the casket did not have any handles. The casket was wheeled directly into the graveyard with attenders following behind. And the tower bells began to toll. It was a very somber and respectful scene walking to the grave with the bells constantly tolling.


At the end of the funeral service, people retrieved their flowers from the front of the chapel and carried them to the grave site. After the casket was placed in the grave, it was dedicated and a temporary cover was placed over the hole. And again, each person placed their flowers over the casket. A few people who did not have a chance to speak during the service due to time constraints, presented their flowers at the gravesite and said a few words as they lay them on top of the grave.

Following the funeral, the family of the deceased hosted a luncheon at a local restaurant for invited guests. During our time there, all the messages of sympathy received in cards were read aloud by the two daughters-in-law. Apparently, very large booklet type cards of remembrance are common. There was a very clever quiz about events in the life of the deceased and his response to them. People were laughing about the answers and often surprised at the correct answers. Some of the children had prepared a very touching Powerpoint presentation about his life. Several of his favorite songs were sung. And during much of the time there was live piano music. Everyone was uplifted by the time they spent together celebrating the life of a truly great man.